I admit it came as a shock to me. But, there it was-- Matthew’s Gospel, Chapter 25. According to Jesus, Republicans are going to Hell.

It was equally shocking how I came to this conclusion. Believe it or not, my wife and I actually went to church yesterday morning. And, so far, there have been no reports of nails popping out of wood or the mortar between bricks melting.

It’s been a long train coming. I attended St. Luke’s Episcopal Church from approximately 1986 to 1992 and, to avoid any libel or slander, let’s just say I and several other folks ended up leaving.

But, my heart’s always been there. As a little kid growing up in Cleveland, I knew in my gut I’d end up there. Though I was neck-deep in fundamentalism, I just knew it would happen. And, though the Catholic experience has been a good experience, the heart knows what the heart knows.

St. Luke’s always has been and always will be home.

Within the Episcopal Church, I can unabashedly be an Englishman. I can practice my philosophical approach to Buddhism. And, within the Anglican view of the world, the only way I can go to Hell is if I use the wrong fork at a dinner party.

So, with my wife’s blessing and enough caffeine to prop me up after having worked a double-shift at the hospital the day before, we proceeded to the gothic house of worship, the little church downtown with the wall around it and the mausoleum behind it.

Much to my amazement, the place was packed out. You’d have thought it was Christmas Eve, based on the attendance. But, we squeezed in and the mass began. And before I realized it, there it was-- the Gospel reading for the day:

“When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory: And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats: And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left. Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.”

Wow.

And, to think, for the last thirty years, the Republicans wanted the rest of us to think they had a lip-lock on Christianity.

But, with the Republicans in charge, the cost of food and drink has risen while wages have stalled. That’s a polite way of making sure needs go unmet. The Republicans have also gleefully let 47 million Americans go without health insurance, while those with it have seen its benefit erode annually. And, the Republicans have championed a war on drugs that we’re never going to win, that’s created the lion’s share of our prison population.

It was pretty clear to me. As far as Jesus was concerned, the Republicans are going to Hell.

The day wore on, though. The mass ended. I came home and took a nap. I got up and went to the hospital to work the second shift. And, then I came home, thinking maybe I was being a bit harsh. One of the things I like about Anglicanism is that group of thinkers in the church called Universalists. They believe that, if Christ died for everyone’s sins, then Christ died for everyone’s sins. Ergo, everybody eventually will get to Heaven.

Then, I turned on the television, to wind down a bit before going to bed. Again, providentially, the set came on to the Fox News Channel. I’ve been cruising by it occasionally, since Obama won, out of a shameless sense of Schadenfreude. And, it was the closing minutes of Mike Huckabee’s show.

He had assembled a group of television station staffers into an ad hoc rock band, including himself on bass. They performed, arguably, the . . . whitest . . . version of the Beatles’ “Twist and Shout” that has ever been aired on national television. In a momentary Dark Night of the Soul, I envisioned that bovine old woman (apparently his wife) who always stood behind Huckabee at his presidential rallies and I forced out of my mind the image of her doing a “Twist and Shout” shimmy in hopes of seducing him. And, I instantaneously knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that John Lennon and George Harrison were spinning in their graves.

Yep, the Republicans are going to Hell.

TWH